“Are you an Indian?”

Let me start by saying I have the greatest respect for Native American peoples — both for their enduring the invasion of their homeland, and for their ability to take dusty reservation land and turn it into ski resorts, billion-dollar casinos, oil/gas well bonanzas, art and more … I get all that, and I salute them. And I treasure the ways of old …

But … I have often found that a bizarre question is a great icebreaker, as I attempt to meet other travelers during my PingWi-Fi travels.

So, when I wrapped up my trip to Taos, New Mexico with the obligatory trip to see the working Taos Pueblo culture, I posed that question to a few passersby.

But here’s the hitch. I only asked people who were noticeably blond and of European descent, much like myself, as we wondered around the dusty tribal attraction.

Ha … I got some really strange looks of disbelief. Some actually thought I was serious, and answered “Nah, Nah” with Nordic accents. Eventually, they saw my humor and we played together nicely.

Now, about this Pueblo culture — I mean, from a photo standpoint, it is like walking into a Georgia O’Keefe painting … bright colors juxtaposed with muddy orange adobe hues … light and shadow bending over cube dwellings and round earth ovens (“hornos”) … the picturesque San Geronimo church, etc., etc.

And the interaction with the artisans! There is traditional and avant pottery in the homes/galleries as well, striking paintings, new age herbal health remedies and burning sage air fresheners … more than I can mention.

If you have not visited, imagine on the outside that the Pueblo is just as you have seen in countless postcards. On the inside, some of the houses are simple and sparse, with only a few onyx pipes and animal skin drums on display. Some might rival a high-end gallery in Taos or Santa Fe.

My favorite? Near the front of the Pueblo is a house featuring art, music and the spoken word of double Grammy winner Robert Mirabal. Darned the luck. I was told he was there a few hours before my visit. I traded notes with one of his colleagues and we made a treaty … IF she pings me on this site, she will get a free PingWi-Fi t-shirt in the desert color of her choice.

Back to my thoughts on the Native peoples … The one recording I own that features flutist or flautist Robert Mirabal is a CD of Michael Martin Murphy music … Also, do you know MMM’s song “Geronimo’s Cadillac”? It tells the story much better than I, about the Indians being dumped on reservations, their tenacity, the hardships, their survival and eventual payoff in the long run.

Geronimo’s Cadillac

I digress … you must see the Taos Pueblo … even though I detected no Wi-Fi in and around the houses.

Back to the ranch, so to speak. After I left the Pueblo, I made a rare appearance in a casino. Yes, I contributed a meager amount to the tribe’s war chest … but I did walk away with a little … One of my new cherished souvenirs is a voucher from Taos Mountain Casino for 99 cents.

So … Taos has more art galleries than you can shake an atlatl at. There are wannabe shamans, crystal/mineral emporiums, a plethora of coffee shops, world-class restaurants … do it got Wi-Fi?

It do. Here’s what I found:

First up, the appropriately named Taos Java. I think I formed a bit of a tourist crush on the owner — not for her beauty, which she had in generous amounts indeed, but for her work ethic. Donna busts her arse, moving quickly around the shop and behind the counter, making it happen! Oh Taos Java is plenty cool, with native-inspired décor, funky craftsy wooden furniture and timbered ceilings … but it has a much faster pace than many of the laidback retail Taos establishments. I found the pace refreshing. I had places to see and people to be …

TJ even has a computer workstation for the laptop challenged, and the local merchant map lists it as a cyber café … or was that another joint? There are worse things to be called …

At first blush, I was thinking perfect score. With a little persuasion, it could happen, but this time 6 pings. Taos Java has perfect Wi-Fi, passcode protected (buy a drink, get the code), excellent atmosphere, great coffee and frozen drinks. I made a slight deduction on the watermelon smoothie … which is a tough drink to pull off, in all fairness.

Five Star Burgers — excellent burger. But, no Wi-Fi? I had their signature burger, which has gorgonzola cheese and a huge patty on a brioche bun. Note: the green chili mayo on the side turned the extra trimmings into an accompanying salad.

Five Star Burgers

But what? Fries on the side are extra and no Wi-FI? … no score.

My first visit to Mondo Kultur was not everything it could be — but I admire their honesty. I walked in carrying my laptop one evening, and the heads-up hostess informed me the store was closing in 15 minutes. Good call. I left and came back the next morning. I was glad I did. The owner was working the morning shift, and she is also the entrepreneur who launched Chica Blanca Burritos. Nice lady.

Mondo Kultur has an excellent cup of Joe, and the joint is filled with locals. This is what I have been looking for. In Taos, the locals easily can outweigh the tourists when it comes to eclecticism. And my new Mondo Kultur Krew were up to the challenge. I sat with a group of a dozen or so locals and traded Internet observations. Several Taosians showed me their Web sites and I showed mine. There was an attorney, some retired Ph.D. educators, a construction guy, a TV executive, etc., etc., Most of then snatched up free PingWi-Fi t-shirts … which “made my heart sang.”

There were so many people with the free shirts, it could have been a flash mob all decked out in PingWF attire. As the krew subsided, one gentleman stayed behind to chat. Diverse guy? Ha … he had invented a light bulb used in film, won an Oscar, produced documentaries, and most recently run for president of New Mexico only, and taken his case to The Supreme Court (verifying now).

See Daniel Pearlman referenced in this article:

Background

Oh yah, and Mondo Kultur has mundo Wi-Fi and movie rentals, rock ‘n’ roll artwork, Native American art, Janis Joplin on the stereo, and yes, leopard print carpet .. “Todo el mundo canto, y yo canto tambien” — 6 pings.

Another place kept slipping through my fingers … meaning I couldn’t catch them open. That is the one and ONLY thing I would change about Loka Bakery — they close at 3 p.m. Finally on my last morning in Taos, I snuck up on my prey and caught them open. Well worth the wait!

I had a great Americano and a steaming cup of free Wi-Fi … on-line, sending out tweets and adding caffeine to my mixture immediately.

Loka is basically an art gallery that just happens to have a great coffee shop/bakery/cafe between the lines. Leo Garel, for one, caught my eye. Klara, behind the counter, did a great job representin … what more could I want?

Great art, sustenance, lots of cool factor, hip music, Wi-Fi — all just a block or so off the plaza. Loka Bakery gets 7 pings, a perfect score.

Man, there are coffee shops everywhere in Taos, no doubt a must for the winter ski season.

I love the name of the Taos alternative publication The Horse Fly. Here is what they had to say:

“Just review with me the musical names of the shops as you encounter them when you enter town from the south: Full Belly Deli, Purple Sage Café, The Bean, Taos Java, Mondo Kultur, Wired? Coffee Cyber Café behind Albertson’s, Café Loka on Ledoux, World Cup at the crossroads, Noula’s on the Plaza and Caffé Tazza on Kit Carson, Koffee Kats in the Bent St. Shops, The Coffee Spot (used to be the Northside Bean), Elevation in El Prado, Taos Cow in Seco, and two Black Diamond Coffees at the Ski Valley, one by Taos Ski and Boot and one on the backside of the mountain in Kachina Basin.

Taos’s coffee places fit into that social pattern. We have our créma connisseurs and blend cognoscenti, but for more than half of the patrons (I’m betting), the feel of the place keeps them coming. As the theme music of the TV sitcom “Cheers” sang, “You want to go where everybody knows your name.”

Well played.

The next to catch my eye was The Bean. It is in a somewhat non-descript little shopping center, but the owners have done a great job to Taos-tify the place, with raw timbers fencing off a neat little patio area. Inside, the café is nice and quaint. I tried a bean freeze — clever — Heath Bar bean freeze to be exact. It worked, but, The Bean needs straws of a bigger caliber before it takes on chunky heath matter in the frozen treat.

Wi-Fi? No! I was shocked, I mean a place that put that much thought into its name (just kidding) didn’t include wireless Internet on the menu. A brain freeze for me, but no score for you. Sorry.

The last night in Taos, I checked out Sushi A La Hattori primarily because of the artwork outside the restaurant. SALH is in the Overland Sheepskin Company complex. So, there are fountains, gardens, other shops and really cool sculptures surrounding the place. Wi-Fi? Nope. Like the sculptures, SALH relies on its good neighbors for a Wi-Fi network. Thanks to The Salon for Wi-Fi. And the art … very nice steel recycling motif by Bruce Campbell … and others.

I finished off a boat load of great, and seemingly very fresh sushi and had edamame as an appetizer. Who am I to question the sushi master, but I suggest some sea salt sprinkled on the edamame … then you have perfection.

I get by with a little help from my friends and/or neighbors. Sushi A La Hattori chose a location with Wi-Fi and other people’s art … but it worked to their advantage — 4 pings.

My very first sample on this trip — free Wi-Fi outside Koffee Kat, just across the ally from Taos Plaza, in the Bent Street area. I liked the walk-up window for grabbing a quick latte or whatever … But, I felt the server was working too hard between counter and window, cutting down on smiley time.

However Ms. nonchalant did have time to sit behind me on her break, smoke and violate my air space … LOL. I’ll cut her slack, though, because I like her purple hair. Later on, I saw the same woman at an intersection, and she yielded to let me, the crazy guy on the bicycle, ride on through. Peace!

Oh … back to Koffee Cat … I tried a fun s’more smoothie. It was good, but I ask you, do you put peanut butter in your s’more? I think not.

I don’t like to diss, but I felt ignored in the service/personality category. The inside seating was not overflowing with love or bodies either. Wi-Fi was good, a saving grace — 3 pings.

Obviously I could go on and on … I won’t, but I must mention two more “vendors.” First, my hometown-based RadioShack. They tried. What I mean is that my rechargeable battery for my camera went dead. The Shack didn’t have the exact batter, but they sold me a rechargeable replacement. Unfortunately it didn’t work.

So … I was pretty down. There were two-days-worth of travel photos stuck in my camera as I arrived in Taos … perhaps about to be lost. AND, I had two days of pinging Wi-Fi and shooting more photos ahead of me.

Next stop … and the most valuable stop on my trip — Walmart! It started touch and go with Wally Mart. I wandered through the electronics department and was shunned by not one, not two, but three sales associates. Basically: “Cameras … not my department.”

Apparently it was no one’s department … and then oh lucky day! An executive from Walmart corporate saw me and the funny, inquisitive look on my face and stopped to help me. Lara took charge and grabbed a replacement battery, made the sale and sent me packin!

The obsessive amounts of photos in this blog post are thanks to Lara at Walmart … oh and get this. Taos is a small town. The next day, Lara and her colleague were at the breakfast buffet in my hotel … The Hampton Inn. (Decent Wi-Fi … but we should talk …) We spoke and exchanged business cards. Also, I distracted her momentarily and stole some food off her plate. (I don’t know why, for gosh sakes, it was a free buffet …) But anyway, don’t tell her!

Know what I sayin?