Driving in and around Warren, Michigan, Bloomfield Hills, Beverly Hills, Oak Grove, Royal Oak … marveling at how lush and green the grass is in this place. Driving by the golf courses, i am thinking it is a wonder golf wasn’t invented here. Immaculate. Plenty of forestation in this glove-shaped, land swatch between several Great Lakes. So humid. A few of the leaves are blowing off … No color changes in the trees yet. Wait a week or so. The shadows, however, are fall-like. The shadows are long, and subconsciously you know the sun has moved and soon the warm weather will follow it. This place will become a deep freeze. Everyone knows it … and they are embracing the pleasant sunshine today, en masse.

So … one a day off from The Dirty Gig, Ping did some “war driving” as they used to call it, scouting out places with Wi-Fi. My first free moment here in Michigan, I headed out to Grosse Pointe … yes the community featured in the John Cusack film … the assassin comedy.

 

While the mansions are incredible, I didn’t see that many retail establishments to ping on the Jefferson Avenue drag. (The downtown area was another story …) Grosse Pointe … a wonderful line of mansions, stretching along the shoreline of Lake Saint Clair … opulence! Hmmm … should I crash in on the upper crust?

 

So … pondering my sailing attire, as I drove by, I called the yacht club, but got voice mail right away and came to my senses/lost my nerve … decided not to talk my way into their flotilla … He’s “Not The Yachting Type.”

 

Anyone else remember this one-hit wonder, why the strong finish? I digress …

 

 

Can’t believe I chickened out. That’s not like me. As a blogger I tend to go in places, boldly, as if I am a wedding crasher. Guess I wasn’t on my game.

 

In the ensuing days, I made various stops at one of two Starbucks on Gratiot in Roseville, Mich. … interesting mix of people, including a street hustler whom I overheard accost 3-4 tables of ladies asking them the same question: “How does this Wi-Fi work?” Hey buddy. This is my corner … my schtick:)

 

I landed at the northernmost Starbucks on Gratiot and always found an easy chair and great Wi-Fi on all of my visits.

 

 

Great. Not too far from the water, yachts and mansions, without the pretension. Just need to throw out obnoxious street types who run off the paying customers – six pings.

 

Glad that I left the shoreline of Lake Saint Clair for a while, I toured more wealthy areas further “inland.” My exploration took me to Bloomfield Hills … with purpose.

 

The designation – Chase Bank in Bloomfield Hills … great service, nice guy at the desk … He snatched up a PingWi-Fi shirt, which was a good trade for a new debit card. Seems some hoodlum had compromised my old debit card and attempted to swipe it in Houston. Sounded like a pretty smart scam, targeting a Texan, with a bogus purchase in another Texas city.

 

 

However, Chase was all over this, since their records indicated most of my swiping has been in Michigan for the last month. Good looking out!  Chase gets 7 pings for the hook up on new plastic.

 

Birmingham … another really nice community with a happening retail, restaurant, coffee shop scene around the downtown area … a pretty cool Police Department building at the heart.

 

 

In Birminghamn, I staked a claim on an easy chair at Starbucks for a couple of hours and people watched a slightly older demographic than what I had seen over in Rosedale. Speaking of older demographic group … I took note that Duran Duran will be playing soon in the cool older Birmingham Theater in the downtown area.

 

Birmingham, Mich., is the U.S. headquarters for the company that takes this blogger all over the world on The Dirty Gig. What a great place for a headquarters … you know, if you have to work …

 

Other points of interest … Motown! Of all the things to do in Detroit, visiting the record label museum was first on my list. However, the Motown Museum is closed on Sundays and Mondays … so that blew my Labor Day plan. Maybe there will be another chance. I took my selfie with The Temptations backing me up (their photo is displayed in the window), checked to see if there was Wi-Fi and hit the road … ha … listening to “My Papa Was A Rolling Stone.”

 

Another mainstay here in Michigan has been Leason’s Dairy Bar & Grille. They have the dubious honor of being near my laundromat, so they have become a fave … they have Wi-Fi and they cone a mean waffle, so to speak.

 

 

Just wish that Leason’s was open a little later in the evenings. Great Wi-Fi, and luckily I am able to grab the booth with the one electrical outlet on most nights … great nostalgic jukebox and vintage rocker photos everywhere. That spells “malt shop” in my book – 5 pings.

 

Then here’s my hotel … Although the Wi-Fi is average, I have stayed at worse places than The Baymont Inn. At least this place awards “frequent flyer” points. They have been dealing with my quirkiness for about a month now. Ha … hope they don’t rate me as a guest on a scale of 1 to 7.

 

 

The Baymont gets 5 pings … decent Wi-Fi, a pool, acceptable breakfast … but 3 days and two frozen rotisiary chickens in my fridge, several complaints before you changed out the faulty ice box? My favorite thing at Baymont? The night shift lady — probably a student — with the best disposition every morning at 5:45 as she prepares breakfast for us after her all-night shift. Such a great thing to see a person who is happy in their job. Her name? Why it is the same as my favorite country song ever … “Ruby.” She assured me that millions of old guys have quoted the song, telling her “don’t take your love to town.” I digress …

Hmmm … thinking “out loud” … maybe a trip over to Ann Arbor, Mich., to see if the Wolverines are hanging out, licking their wounds from the 31-0 shillelagh shellacking at the hands of The Irish on Saturday.

 

Well when I drove into Ann Arbor … The Blue Leprechaun was still standing despite the Wolverines getting clobbered by The Irish … what was it, 31-0? (Oh … sorry, I already said that didn’t I?) Wonder if that Leprechaun crafts blue beer???

 

Down the street, I pulled over to park and to my surprise was apparently on Greek Row, as about 150 young ladies (potential pledges) marched into a three-story house, all the while, the members serenading them … a bit like the song of the sirens, sucking them in, methinks.

 

 

 

Once afoot, I headed down University and stopped in a Mediterranean grill — Oasis Mediterranean Grill. I had hummus on my mind for several days already, then saw the sign that said “Free Wi-Fi.” That pulled me in ever bit as surely as the angelic, inviting voices of serenading sorority girls had done with the unsuspecting freshmen a few blocks away. Yum … a plate of lamb and chicken kabobs, a great garlic paste, the aforementioned hummus and a passel of rice. Ha … for nostalgia, I had a Mellow Yellow (what an unusual drink to feature in any restaurant, much less a Middle Eastern eatery,) although I am sure it was my first fountain version of the ‘70s Mountain Dew knockoff soft drink.

 

 

Nice guys working at Oasis. They customized the menu for me, to create a sampler for less than four people. I am considerably less than four … and they are most ping worthy — 6 pings.

 

Next, I was headed to a little boba tea place spotted on University, when a cool little corner coffee shop distracted me. Espresso Royale, since 1987 they say, is the place to be (at least on Sunday afternoon). Ha … ER is on the edge of the University of Michigan campus, at the corner of bearded dude and black stretch pants. Man there is diversity on this campus … with a leaning toward our Middle Eastern friends, one might deduce.

 

At Espresso Royale, I had a fine, crafted (ha!) Italian soda … I laugh every time I hear someone describe a drink or a brew as crafted. Oh the pretension … I digress. Great Wi-Fi at E. Royale. I fired up Mike Love’s reggae channel on Pandora via the laptop, and sent out tweets praising SquareRüt for turning me on to Mike Love’s Hawaiian haole reggae. Streaming is a great test of a joint’s Wi-Fi network, and despite the dozens and dozens of laptop types on-line, Royale’s streaming never missed a reggae beat.

 

This place is like college Nirvana on a Fall afternoon, with temperatures in the low 80s. I bet it was one wild place pre-game yesterday.

 

 

Ha … I thought it was cool at face value … then looked deeper … there is a basement too, filled with tables of kids studying and caffeinating, in some great A/C I might add. Pretty cool – 7 pings.

 

Outside E. Royale, there was one blonde young lady with an “in your face” green t-shirt, the morning after (remember, the shellacking?). Ha! I read her shirt twice, before realized it said, “Fight me, I’m Irish.” On the first reading, I mistakenly thought the verb was a little less innocent.

 

Great … Finally saw a young man with hair down to his arse … keeping that whole thing alive, whatever that is … Restored my faith in college kids everywhere.

 

Funniest band name spotted on a t-shirt – Trampled By Turtles.

 

So where did that boba place go? Ah there it is … just past a place called BurgerFi … hmmm … was that a Wi-Fi reference? A Marine reference? Maybe a fraternity thing? I may never know. It was empty, so I moved on.

 

Walking, walking … on to find the boba … the tapioca-ball-and-tea goodness. As I walked on, I marveled at how upbeat the kids here seem to be, after what had to be an embarrassing loss … life goes on.

 

 

Finally I made it to Mo Mo Tea shop and got my boba on (assuming you have read this blog and know all about the Asian treat with the yummy tapioca floaties mixed in…). Yes, Mo Mo has Wi-Fi. If you hurry, the passcode is Summer2014. I opted for an almond flavored tea. Love the wide .38 caliber straws used to transport these things from the cup to your mouth.

 

Interesting … at first blush … was loving the place, then encountered a pungent funk … of course it was emitting from the couch where I had chosen to sit. Ha …”I swear it ain’t me.” I excused myself … no not for that … However, I did have to visit the boys’ room to relieve my bladder of all the crafted liquids. That’s when I noticed something really interesting. When I went to the water closet, it was the very first time every that a bathroom — in any of the thousands of coffee shops and tea rooms I have visited — smelled fresher than the cafe proper. Weird. Whatever … but regardless of the odor, I could manage … I had to. My laptop battery was low. So … boba on, funk soul brother. Ah good news. Someone left, and it seemed “the fragrance” walked as well.

 

Time to test the boba Wi-Fi. “Let’s try some reggae channel streaming at Mo Mo to test hotspot” … no wait. I punched in a new channel on Pandora just for this occasion. How about we listen to … Yo Yo Ma at Mo Mo? Makes sense to me. Ha … fired up the Yo Yo station, and the first song they played was called “Momotaro.” (Follow all that?) Perfect, and a faultless Wi-Fi stream to help me chill with Yo Yo’s cello. Wonder if Yo Yo ever considered creating the MoMotown recording label … I digress.

 

 

It was hard not to be swayed by the initial hygiene thing … but great Wi-Fi and a stellar, full bodied, unpretentious, well crafted boba. More bobas per capita in their cups than any one cafe I have seen … Love the sealed drink lids at boba joints … Still wondering what it means on the lid, where it says “Ping Guo.” Hmmm … One last thing, should I challenge the waitress to arm wrestle for a “Got Boba?” t-shirt? The front of their shirts feature a crazy little stuffed bear  … kind of a cross between a Grateful Dead logo and a Hello Kitty sticker. Love it – 6 pings.

 

Know what I sayin?